Right after I had James I looked down at my perfect little baby and kissed every little finger, and every little toe. It was so fun watching him grow, and as he was learning new things there were ofter bumps and bruises. Now with bumps and bruises as a mom we bend down and kiss the knees, and elbows.
The power of a mothers' kiss is amazing. It can take a hurt little boy whose little world has come crashing down back to where it should be... and even better, any owie that has happen is instantly made better with the mother's kiss. As a new mom I just knew that that my kisses could fix every thing!
That is until it didn't.
When Tim was born at 30 weeks he was so little. The doctors took him away and I wasn't able to see him for a few hours, and it was a day before I could hold him. My little baby was in the hospital fighting for his little life and I couldn't do anything. I wanted to kiss him better, but I was only allowed to touch his ever so small hand.
I couldn't kiss him better. I wanted too. I cried as I held him and softly kissed his head. Feeling like there was nothing I could do but wait... wait for him to be big enough and strong enough to leave.
So I prayed. I prayed that he would get better. I prayed that I would be strong enough for what ever happens. I prayed that his spirit would be a strong one and that he would continue to fight for this beautiful life.
That little baby has now grown into a crazy strong willed child. He often has bumps and bruises that I get to kiss better. And my kisses work.
I prayed often before this happen. I just never expected the intensity of my prayers to be so strong as I was praying for this new spirit. When you have a sick child it's so different. Even as you pray for them you are praying for yourself to be comforted and to have the mindset of "Thy Will." The thought of having to give him back to my Father in Heaven was a hard one, and something that I didn't want to think about. But it was in that moment that the Atonement made so much sense and the power of what my Savior did for me. And if He had bigger plans for my little baby, and his mission on this earth was completed by just having a body, then I would give him back, and know that all is well.
I have learned many new things as a mom, but this is the one that really hit me.
Kisses are amazing! Prayers are answered!