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Saturday, July 27, 2013

To School we go

This has been a really hard summer for me. Besides the move, and helping Steve start his practice, I have known for a while now that the boys would be actually be going to school this year.

I have always said that I would homeschool the boys until I was directed to something else. I was never one that was dead set on homeschooling from birth to graduation, although I want too. I counsel with Steve and the Lord often about teaching the boys. It would be a year by year thing.

Back in March, before our life was turned upside down, I had the impression that the boys needed to be registered for school. While we were in North Carolina I actually put them in the lottery for a really good Charter school and while they were on the waiting list, they were on the wait list and had a good chance of getting in.

Before we left North Carolina I prayed some more and got the same answer, so I consigned all my homeschool stuff except what we are working on. That was really hard to walk away from that store, feeling like I was walking away from 4 years of my life.

Then our world was turned upside down with a major move. All through this we schooled as best we could and tried to stay on top of everything.

Being here I prayed some more, and still had the impression that they needed to be in school.

Honestly it breaks my heart.

I am so nervous. My oldest is going to school for the first time.... at 4th grade.

I am nervous for them. I am also nervous to have my faults laid out. What if they fail at math?? That would be my fault. What if I totally screwed up on science?? And I never did teach spelling.

I worry about bad habits... I worry about friends... I worry about bullying.... I worry about their education.

I know what is going on with the public schools and the changes that are happening, and I have prayed and still the answer is they need to be in school.

And I worry that they will love it so much and never want to come home. I worry that their teachers will do a better.... funner job than me.

But I know that the Lord knows these boys better than I do. I know that He has their best interest at heart. I know that He is looking out for our family. I know that He knows the desires of my heart, and that He has taken that into consideration, but ultimately He has the final say and I try hard to do His will.

When I knew they were to go to school this next year I had no idea what was in store for me. But it looks like I will be working at the office for a while until we can afford to hire someone. The Lord know me. He knows what is in store for me and what is the best road for me to walk. I think I would have fought sending the kids to school for me to go to work a lot more had I not known for as long as I have.

So while this is not what I would have picked, we are going to embrace it. The boys are starting to get a little more excited. I am trying to prepare them as best I can and have a positive attitude.

I will miss my boys during the day. I will miss the crazy and the loud and the fun. And yes... I will even miss the not so happy days.

I hope this is only for a year or two. And then I can bring them back home. But really it's not up to me. I don't know what the future holds {I wish I did} But I will do the best I can.

6 comments:

Christine Rowley said...

They'll be okay at school. With having so many boys, I'm sure they can hold their own. I miss my kids when they are gone. But I do enjoy the clean house and quiet. You'll get plenty of time to work with them on homework.

Christine Rowley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michelle... said...

It is hard to make such extreme changes and you've made so many at once. What amazing faith you have and such an example of following the spirit. It may not be an easy path (for anyone), but obviously the right one. Best of luck to all of you!
Where did you register them?

Michelle... said...

It is hard to make such extreme changes and you've made so many at once. What amazing faith you have and such an example of following the spirit. It may not be an easy path (for anyone), but obviously the right one. Best of luck to all of you!
Where did you register them?

Anonymous said...

You're such a fantastic mom! I can tell you really love your children! Know that if you're following promptings of the spirit you'll always make the right decision. Our Father loves your boys even more than you do and he knows what is best. Trust and have faith in your own ability to feel the spirit. All is well. <3 you!

Mackey Family said...

They will do great!!! I've decided to put Kolby back at Suncrest so hopefully your boys and Kolby can strike up a friendship and be pals!!! lets get the boys together when things slow down for you a bit!!!

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